X, the press secretary for the Department of Truth, today announced that an unnamed whistle blower has been charged with something and will be tried somewhere. The heavily redacted press release also included a number of intransitive verbs and definite articles, and at least three nouns, which taken together paint a picture of a man, or perhaps woman, who might have done something at some point in time, possibly with a computer and a cell phone.
Libertarian Republicans in the House of Representatives called for the whistle blower’s immediate execution on the grounds that “Whatever it is that h/she did is a direct threat to American freedom.”
