Florida governor Ron De Santis announced the felon re-enfranchisement treasure hunt. The small-g governor has been under intense criticism for undermining the felon-re-enfranchisement amendment, which was approved by 66% of Florida voters in 2020. The main criticism of the governor is that many ex-felons are not able to vote because they owe an undisclosed amount of court fees, and therefore can’t pay them.
The treasure hunt addresses this problem head on. The Secretary of Voter Enhancement explains:
“The treasure hunt is a way of testing the felon’s commitment to democracy. We give the felon a series of clues, and if they solve the puzzle their treasure is the right to vote!”
Tallahassee Cracker: We understand the policy is culturally sensitive too.
Secretary: It is. Say you’re a good-ole boy from the panhandle who got into some bad liquor and shot up a few parking meters. Well your challenge will be appropriate to who you are. You go to a voting office, announce yourself, name your poison and we pour you a drink while signing you up.
TC: Say you’re a Latina who became a felon for hair-dressing without a license?
Secretary: Well in that case, you’d probably have to do something mathematical, like solve a quadratic equation or explain the three-body problem using calculus.
TC: No jelly bean counting?
Secretary: Hah! We save the tough hunts for the tough nuts. For example there was this dude down in Dade, a habitual cannabis user,
TC: Cannabis is a Schedule 1 narcotic. That’s serious drug abuse.
Secretary: Indeed. His challenge is to get to the Sea of Tranquility on the Moon. He’s sweeping floors in Cape Canaveral so he’s on his way. Hah!
